Our relationship with time is underneath the stress and anxiety of feeling we have too much to do. We often try and speed up and then sense time is going faster and think that there isn’t enough as we fill it. We can make time through slowing down.

On Being Too Busy - Project Self Life Coaching

On Being Too Busy

I am not busy. This sometimes feels like a dirty secret or a guilty confession within today’s social norm. I have only just released myself from the ‘shoulding’ of busyness. A part of me has been telling myself that I should be doing more with my time, with my life. Busy means to be active and engaged, to not be ‘at leisure’.  I believe that being is also a way to be actively engaged with life. I’m one of those people who looks for the spaces between commitments in their calendar, rather than a person who likes to see they…
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On Slowing Down - Project Self Life Coaching

On Slowing Down

This is the second part of a piece reflecting on time. Wasting Time explored the link between values of achievement and the need to be busy, rushing and filling time. Slowing down time is about developing our capacity to be still, find pauses, value moments and appreciate time by being present; being in time not working against it. Slowing down time is about slowing ourselves down. We can create a sense of time and space for ourselves; only through deliberate choices about our relationship with time. Manage time by saying no to an unnecessary sense of obligation. Be mindful and realistic…
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On Wasting Time - Project Self Life Coaching

On Wasting Time

What’s your relationship with time? This piece is the first part of two explorations into Time: 1) fast time 2) slow time. Time is the back drop, the crucible, the catalyst. The start and stop, the constant duration and the spaces in between. It’s a measure of the past, present and future of our life-time, but also now and the split second moment that has just passed of our living-time. It’s a stream and an interval, preparation, the event and the dissection. How amazing that one concept affects so much of our reality in so many varied ways. It defines existence…
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ON DOING NOTHING - Project Self Life Coaching

On Doing Nothing

Mind the gap is a familiar warning. Mine to you would be make the gap. Find the gap. The interval; the interlude; the break; the empty space.     Create space; find time; in between… Ensure that there is a space between arrival and departure, between one thing and the next, between one zone and another. Be aware of those moments, those transitions and transactions. Find those un-named, ill-defined places without purpose. Relish their vacuum and step into them. They are opportunities for respite, reflection and rest. For being without mission or requirement or determination. Don’t avoid them or rush to…
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On Feeling Discomfort - Project Self Life Coaching

On Making Change

This post is written around the New Year, but the ‘New Year’ can be any point in time we take to reflect on the larger picture, larger timescale. The New Year, more than any other time is a chance to feel optimistic about what may be ahead; to relish the unknown, to anticipate and welcome change. For me, it’s not a time to list goals, but a time to reflect on where I am in my life. Some years nothing seems to change much, as whatever it is we are in is still unfolding. We may feel like we are…
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On waiting for the answer - Project Self Life Coaching

On Waiting for the Answer

A key skill taught to coaches is the capacity to ‘hold space’ for our clients. This involves giving you, the client, plenty of time and space to respond, to think, to feel, to reflect, particularly in response to a question. This may mean sitting with silence. It means waiting. It means sitting in silence for longer than you normally would, and initially it can feel strange or uncomfortable. But it is the most powerful coaching skill. If you wait that little bit longer before following up with another question or another prompt, this is the space where the insight often…
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