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Project Self Life Coaching

Inner Critic

One of the most affective things we can do to create internal change is to change our relationship to the inner critic; the unkind internal narrative we run about ourselves and tend to buy into.

ON BEING KIND TO YOURSELF - Project Self Life Coaching

On Being Kind to Yourself

Project Self
Our innate human quality is compassion and kindness. In our natural, relaxed state we are warm and caring. Our self is inclusive and allowing. Such qualities expand us towards consideration, generosity and understanding, trust and forgiveness. We have sympathy for suffering.  We like. We are kind. We are love. When we are unhappy or upset we can become tight and sometimes ‘mean’ spirited. Our capacity towards generosity and openness diminishes. We shrink in as our heart suffers; we may close off, down and up. We contract our care as we take on negative or challenging thoughts and feelings. We may…
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ON NOT FEELING BAD - Project Self Life Coaching

On Not Feeling Bad

Project Self
We often feel bad about ourselves, conflating how we can behave with who we are. We can also feel a dislike for who we are and also feel deep down, a sense that we lack worth as a human being. And so we tread heavily on the earth, comparing our weighty lack of substance to the seemingly Sorted & Successful Ariel figures around us.  Welcome to the walk of shame. The walking dead. The human experience of walking around feeling like there’s a cloud, a shadow, hanging over you; a weight on your chest; a restriction in your throat or an emptiness…
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ON NOT BEING A BETTER PERSON - Project Self Life Coaching

On Not Being A Better Person

Project Self
“All of us think we are a little better than we really are. All of us think we are a little worse than we really are”. Michael Yapko I’m beginning to rebel against the concept of Being a Better Person. You might think what’s wrong with wanting to be better person? Within the dictionary definition of ‘better’, I found that it does relate to increasing good qualities, but more prevalently, it describes surpassing, superiority, preferability, acceptability. Bettering oneself speaks historically of status. Being a better person suggests we need to improve. Sure, we could all be nicer, kinder people with healthier,…
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On Not Being Productive - Project Self Life Coaching

On Not Being Productive

Project Self
Along with “Have you had a good day”? how often are we asked: “Have you had a productive day” or “What have you done today”? ’Good’ as a measure or description seems open to interpretation since a day can be good for a number of varied and subjective reasons. But productive as a measure holds within it an implicit judgement. Have you done something useful with your life today? Have you been constructive? Applied yourself, achieved? Been energetic, focused? It feels as though a productive day is ‘good’ and related to success. So that if we haven’t been productive somehow…
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